Confessions On Karan’s Couch

Star Salman Khan leaves Johar dumbstruck and tongue-tied on talk show “Koffee With Karan’s” season premiere

Sharin Bhatti December 3, 2021

Koffee With Karan

When this bow-tied gent awkwardly grinned while tap dancing and waltzing on a Broadway style stage backed up by his own entourage of showgirls, we didn’t really know what to expect from the recently premiered season of “Koffee With Karan.” But that’s just what the showman and the makers of the scandalous talk show wanted us to believe when the promos of Season Four first appeared on Star World. Even though we were willing to look beyond that let-me-not-see-that-again please imitation of George Valentin on screen, our curiosity was piqued to see what drama will unfold this season. And we weren’t disappointed. The first guest Salman Khan was a sinful deelish to smoke. While the star came with his blinkers off and barriers down, he not only deflected the hits but also fired those blazin’ shots back at schoolboy Johar. Here are our top hit and miss moments from the season premiere episode.

  • POO

The usually dapper Khan, made his grand entry in a blue  ensemble with a shiny black shirt and this season, much like on a ludicrous Simi Garewal set, everything screams OTT. The couch is shiny black, there’s a staircase even that looks straight out of KJo’s “Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham” sets. The only thing giving away from this seeming movie set was not just the host’s unfortunate wardrobe choice (red velvet is not a colour for a suit, but is best saved for a cupcake KJo and those lips could’ve been a tad less crimson we reckon), but also Khan’s straight head-in-the-flush welcome. As Khan climbed down the stairs on receiving a magnanimous greeting from Johar, he lamented on the latter’s unfriendly flush. “Karan your flush is not working.” Ah! so this set is KJo’s living room. Yuck, and to make things clear straight off the bat for his host, the next hour belonged to brat Khan. First upset and red cheeks moment for KJO check. Potty humour to diffuse tension check. Right then.

  • KJO’S FLUSHED CHEEKS

If there was anything more redder than Johar’s suit and mouth in this hour, were his flushed cheeks. Causing him to scoff at many an occasion, out of a probable fear of Khan’s unpredictability if nothing else, Johar found himself thoroughly embarrassed with Khan’s rendezvous. For a change, KJo was on the receiving end of Khan’s jibes. Our favourite moment was when during the rapid fire round, KJo quizzes Khan if forced at gunpoint whom would he be gay with and Khan spurts back instinctively first with “Aisi koi gun banni hi nahin hai,” and quickly changes his mind to “You Karan… But I’m the guy.” Embracing the obvious white-elephant in the room, Khan did more than just air his host’s is-he-isn’t-he knickers on national television. And the harmless prodding on quizzing Karan’s bedside manner when KJo confessed to hugging a pillow to sleep. It’s a little creepy to go aww don’t you think?

  • THE 40-SOMETHING VIRGIN

We will say it. Salman Khan is a charmer… Charming and silly enough that we will believe that he is a virgin. “I am a virgin…I am saving myself for marriage,” Khan disclosed and even demonstrated by sinking into his couch how he liked to sleep alone. The love life confessions, without taking other names, included the printed wedding invites when he almost got married to actor Sangeeta Bijlani and how he’d rather look through some of his exes. We are guessing Aishwarya Rai Bachchan is one of them.  The occasional Ranbir and Katrina Kaif references made us believe he’s given his blessings to the couple. Even though he isn’t ready for a commitment yet, Khan will, we repeat “save himself for marriage.” And intimacy for him means “Chaliye na bahut ho gaya. Khana kha lijeye.” Yes Salman, we believe if we catch leprechauns we will get a pot of Gold too. And Santa Clause is real as well.

  • REAL HERO

Having interviewed him, there is no doubt about how genuinely funny and unencumbered Salman Khan really is. The really old-skool star will speak him mind and heart if he feels like and will chuck the scripted answers in the bin. Narrating anecdotes from his past, Khan spoke at length on how generous  gestures from 1980s stars Govinda and Kumar Gaurav grounded him and made him mentor actors like Hrithik Roshan and Arjun Kapoor. These are those moments that truly make you believe in the actor’s humanity. Clearing the air on a range of topics - from a supposed tiff with Ranbir Kapoor, his troubled relationship with sometimes-friend-sometimes-for Shah Rukh Khan, run ins with photographers and fans, his alcoholism - Salman spoke his heart out. And though we didn’t wipe a tear, we almost extended a kleenex to KJo.

  • SALIM KHAN

In a rare interview on screen, Salman’s legendary writer/filmmaker father Salim Khan joined his son on the couch for a cuppa and conversation as well. And for a brief 10-minute duration, we almost believed we were in a living room talking to an adoring dad and son. Father/son duo of Amitabh and Abhishek Bachchan have also warmed the seat before on previous seasons of the talk show, but this laid-back conversational unraveling almost didn’t feel like it was for television. The easy chemistry that Salim and Salman Khan shared with Johar, almost made the audience feel like a fly on the wall in this drawing room chatter. Amongst the free-flowing admiration for his son and family, Salim also recalled a hillarious encounter with a thief in their house and the how the family resolved the situation. A very filmi, large-family moment that we readily bought.

You can watch the full episode here and tell us what you think:

  • The next episode of “Koffee With Karan” airs on December 8, 2021 at 9 pm on Star World and will feature star siblings Ranbir Kapoor and Kareena Kapoor Khan.

 

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